Did you know that Craiglist postings can be voted “best of” by the system’s users? The Best of Craiglist is the perfect place to go to find hilarious classified ad rants. As a word of warning, the subject matter is often sexual or adult. Still, there’s plenty a work safe gem to be found:

For example, there’s a desperate hedge fund manager with actual barrels of crude oil in his apartment to get rid of:

Date: 2004-12-02, 8:20AM EST

Sexy UES hedge fund manager willing to s*ck/f*ck his way out of a crude long position. they told me “it would go up forever”. in any event i have barrels of crude warehousd in my apt. willing to trade s**ual favors for 54.95 a barrel … inquire within this is in or around NYC

Then there’s the naive family guy who wants to give away the doubles he accidentally ordered of family photos:

Date: 2004-06-14, 11:37PM EDT

Hi. I just accidently got doubles for my 35MM color prints which I shot with my Kodak digital camera. I don’t want the doubles so I figured someone on here would want them. They’re no nudes or anything like that. Just pics of me with friends and family, then a few pics of my cats. If you want them email me your home address and i’ll send them off to you. this is in or around bronx

Then there’s the old iPod for a fake girlfriend scheme:

Date: 2004-03-14, 12:50AM EST

Hi, I’m having my parents come visit me sometime in the next two weeks and have lied and told them I am dating someone I am in love with. You will only have to come to one dinner. In exchange for this I will buy you an IPOD – yes new – we walk into the store together and buy a new IPOD. Let me know if this interests you, and if you want to be in a loving relationship with all the benefits it brings I want to pretend we are totally in love. I am 24, swm, a grad student, italian-american, (not a guido), athletic build. Send pics and i will send you mine, note I check email basically every 3 hours. You should be in your 20’s and athletic (great butt and legs are my main interest when I say athletic).

Hilarious. If you’re an avid gamer, you might find this funny:

Level 72 Paladin Seeking 42+ Rogue, Druid, and Sorceress – m4ww
Date: 2006-06-20, 4:36AM PDT

I am seeking a level 42 or above rogue, druid, and sorceress to help me assault the fortress of Mordria, and for hot kinky s3x. I am the sole holder of the Axe of Fragyholt and am a level 72 Paladin equipped with Def+ 52 plate mail [...]

Finally, the winner of the bad title award:

TRADE: My Coke for Your Pot
Date: 2006-05-16, 6:56AM EDT

I have a 12-Can “Fridge Pack” of Coca Cola Zero. What I need is a heavy duty aluminum or non-stick cooking pot suitable for everything from making spaghetti to steaming clams. Will consider other offers!

With enough browsing you’ll find some real gems.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 25th, 2006 at 4:41 pm and is tagged with kodak digital camera, hedge fund manager, craiglist postings, color prints, loving relationship, italian american, grad student, family photos, new ipod, ual, home address, crude oil, family guy, ck, nudes, rants, classified ad, subject matter, girlfriend, cats. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback.

One Response to “The Best of Craiglist Postings”

1. cibbuano says:

   7/25/2006 at 7:15 pm

   I love the best of craigslist… it’s too bad the craigslist page for my city isn’t very active…

   Reply